Wednesday 17th October

Having somewhat arrogantly formed the view that we had seen all that Paris had to offer the Prop and his wife elected to stay “at home” with the McRent Reisemobil and attend to a bit of personal administration.

Walked over the Pont de Suresnes to the Office de Tourisme and spent an engaging 15 or 20 minutes with a lovely French lady who loaded the Prop up with all sorts of pamphlets and gave him all sorts of what he supposes must have been valuable information – all of it in French. The Prop even gave her his best “Je n’ai pas trop bus” (see “The Prologue”) but even this did not dampen her ardour!

The Prop left more than a little confused and wondering how it was that a tourism office came to be staffed by someone who was quite unable to communicate with tourists who don’t speak French!

However, one of the aforementioned pamphlets did catch the prop’s eye – an evening dinner cruise on the Seine starting at €135 (A$215) per person and going up to €600 per person including chauffeur-driven limousine transport to and from the Seine. The Prop thought that this latter deal might seem a bit pretentious – getting picked up by limousine from the front gate of Camping de Bois du Boulogne! Besides, the Prop’s wife had washed her only evening gown earlier that day!

In the end, the prop tracked down a very nice €45 dinner cruise on the “Belle Sur Seine”. The cruise itself was delightful. So too the dinner which included three courses and wine! It would however be remiss of the Prop not to record that the cuisine on offer was Chinese, not French. That is not to denigrate the quality of the food – which was very good. It's just that there seems to be something a bit perverse about going on a dinner cruise in Paris and eating Chinese food!

Tuesday 16th October

Having mastered the Metro with the aid of a pocket PC programme called (appropriately enough) “Metro” the Prop and his wife navigated their way with ease to the cathedral church of Notre Dame. It’s a big place with lots of gargoyles. A touch overdone for the Prop’s simple tastes but impressive nonetheless. One gets the impression that mediaeval Frenchmen can’t have had much spare time having spent most of it building enormous chateaux, abbeys, cathedrals and basilicas and then waging war with each other about who was to own them! The resources which must have been devoted to the construction of religious buildings in those times is truly astounding but one wonders whether they were built for the greater glory of God or the feudal Lords who commissioned them! There is a real sense that there was a bit of a “mine is bigger than yours” competition going on between these jokers.

Left Notre Dame and took a walk through the Marais district famous (apparently) for its bohemian residents and outdoor markets. No bohemians spotted, no outdoor markets on Tuesdays and only an overflowing out of order public toilet for our trouble! (According to a little tourist pamphlet that the Prop’s wife picked up, the Parisiennes boast that they have no fewer than 36 public toilets in Paris. Subtracting those which are out of order or unusable (for reasons which delicacy does not permit me to elaborate) the Prop reckons that there may be as many as three public toilets in Paris. The situation is so bad that at Starbucks they give you a code on your receipt which will allow access to their toilets – this presumably to avoid freeloaders from soiling their facilities. McDonalds on the other hand are much more laissez-faire. It would be misleading to say that they have an “open door” policy so far as toilets are concerned. However, the Prop is aware that a central part of McDonalds sales strategy in Europe is to appeal to American tourists by providing food which tastes exactly the same as they can get at home AND clean toilets. (Whether the toilets taste the same as the ones at home, the Prop is unable to say for want of having conducted the necessary research.))

From the Marais we effortlessly made our way by metro to Montmatre in the north of the city. Crowned by the Basilica Sacre Coeur the butte of Montmatre affords a commanding view of the Paris smog - and we were there on a clear day! No shortage of open air markets or (strangely) Irish Pubs here! Didn’t see any public toilets though. What was once the home of Paris’ artistic community has now become rather commercialised and a little gaudy.

Repaired to the McRent Reismobil by Metro and train to Suresnes Longchamps as dictated by “Metro” (the pocket PC application mentioned above).

Monday 15th October

Le ciel ete gris et les nuages tombè! (Cold cloudy day).

Took the Metro to L’Arc de Triomphe then walked down the Champs Elysèes to the Louvre for a look. Failed to check out all 16 kilometres of corridors and exhibition spaces in the time available but did manage a glimpse of the Mona Lisa, Venus de Milo and Rameses III. The Prop is no Robert Hughes, but believes that he has seen better-looking copies of the Mona Lisa than the original. In fact, the most interesting aspect of the Mona Lisa is watching everyone straining to take photographs of her - presumably to prove that they were there! (Incidentally there are numerous very big signs making it clear that photography is strictly forbidden in the gallery in which the Mona Lisa (“La Giaconda” to the aficionados) is on display. However, with a “fine disregard” (so reminiscent of William Webb Ellis) neither the public nor the Louvre staff seem to take the slightest bit of notice of this prohibition.) I guess that since L. da Vinci painted her over 500 years ago she must be well and truly out of copyright by now.

CHAMBORD TO PARIS

Saturday 13 October 2007

Having travelled from Chambord to Paris just in time to hit the peak hour traffic(!!) the McRent Resemobil arrived at “Camping du Bois De Boulogne situated on the right bank of the Seine just above the Pont du Suresnes and about 12 kilometres from the centre of the city. By the time we arrived, the place (which has over 500 camping sites or “pitches”) was overrun with English, South African, New Zealand and Australian rugby supporters. In some respects the “camping” looked like a rehab centre for depressed Australasians. By contrast, and for obvious reasons, the Poms and the Yappies were in high spirits. We spent the early part of the day walking around Suresnes trying to but a 5 day pass for the Metro/RER/SNCF. I suppose that we should have anticipated that the local Tourist office, which sells the passes, would be closed on a Saturday! Set off about 6.00pm for Stade de France. After taking the bus from the camping to the Metro station at Porte Maillot we discovered that the ticket machine at the station was broken! A hastily handwritten note directed us to walk to the next Metro station in order to buy a ticket so that we could walk back to the first station to take the line to Stade de France. Did that! (In fact managed to buy a 5 day pass). By the time we finally got on the Metro the cars were as full as a fat girl’s sock and the Prop and his wife got in some much needed scrummaging practice fending off some very large South Africans who had no apparent ability to recognise that our carriage had reached its maximum capacity about three stops before they crow-barred their way on! However, this was only to be the beginning of an evening of sublime disorganisation. Upon arrival at Stade de France we discovered that there was no discernible system in place for the orderly movement of pedestrian and/or vehicular traffic. We had arrived at the North end of the stadium and were seated at the southern end. Whether by accident or design (the Prop suspects the latter) it seemed that everyone with tickets at the northern end of the ground had arrived at the southern end. As a result, it took about 40 minutes of jostling and the odd well-formed maul for us to make our way to our seats. Managed to sit down about 10 minutes before kick-off having spent three hours making the 12 kilometre journey. The Prop is convinced that chaos on this scale does not just happen – it must take months of careful planning by the French authorities. The less said about the match between England and France the better! Apart from the closeness of the scores throughout, it was a dull affair in which the Poms scored an opportunistic (though well taken) try in the fist minute before settling down to their usual dour 10-man game. Unaccountably, the French (like the Australians a week before them) evidently tried to take England on at their own game rather than playing to their strengths in the backs. “Les Bleus” showed promise and flair in patches and threatened to score the winning try in the dying moments but failed to do so much to the chagrin of their wildly enthusiastic supporters (who included anyone who was not an Englishman). The Prop has not had time to check the statistics, but is pretty sure that they will reveal that there have been less tries scored at the World Cup than at any before it. This, it may be supposed, is the result of teams like Australia & New Zealand (and to a lesser extent, France) not playing to win but rather, playing not to lose. The irony is of course that in abandoning their more accustomed enterprising style of play in favour of a “safe” game, they have achieved the very opposite of what was intended! Getting out of Stade de France was even more difficult than getting in!!! Again we had to force our way back to the northern end of the ground to get to the Metro. We had anticipated a similar sort if “sardine debacle” on the way back but, astonishingly, some idiot had posted men at the Metro to allocate passengers to carriages in an orderly fashion AND had put on extra trains so that the journey back to Porte Maillot was uneventful, if a little depressing with carriages full of dejected Frenchmen.

Sunday 14 October

Almost as if to mock the misfortune of the French the previous night, the day dawned with a cloudless blue sky. The Prop and his wife decided to go and have a look at the Eiffel Tower. It wasn’t as though we didn’t know what it looked like, but is was a lovely day and, we thought, people will laugh at us if we say we went to Paris and didn’t see the Eiffel Tower. It turns out that we weren’t the only two people in France who had much the same idea that day! On a whim we decided to take a cruise up the Seine from near the Eiffel Tower. It was sensational! The clear warm autumn afternoon light set the stunning architecture along the riverbank aglow. So too the thousands of Parisiennes (some clothed, some not) who hemmed the left bank to take advantage of what was probably the last warm Sunday afternoon before winter. Somehow even paying €28 (about A$40.00) for two pretty ordinary ham and cheese rolls and two cups of coffee didn’t seem to matter in the least! Repaired to the McRent Reisemobil at about 7.00pm to watch the second semi-final between South Africa and Argentina. It was always going to be a tall order for the Argentinians to overcome the ‘Boks (although Fiji had come pretty close the week before) and so it was. Argentina stayed in the match until about the final 10 minutes before South Africa (again) scored a couple of late tries to make the victory appear much more comfortable than it really was. So now the finalists are decided – England and South Africa! This is unlikely to be a sparkling or memorable encounter.

Tuesday 9 October

Continued northwards over the Massif Centrale through some more outstanding scenery. Almost without exception the days here dawn with a chilly fog and heavy cloud covering that does not begin to lift until about midday. Consequently, the landscape was obscured in an eerie shroud for the first part of the journey. Nonetheless, this did not seem to detract from the beauty of the countryside. A word about French road signs and tourist facilities is now necessary. For some reason the French are given to erecting very large official roadside signs with very attractive graphics saying things like “Chateau Such-and –Such”. However, strangely, neither that sign, nor any other, gives any indication of where the said Chateau (or other point of interest) is to be found! Even more disturbing to the Prop is the fact that either the French do not see the beauty of their own country or (which is more likely) do not want anyone to photograph it, because there almost never any parking anywhere near the most scenic lookout spots. After a long day in the cockpit of the McRent Reisemobil, the Prop and his wife made for the quaintly named “Camping Municipal Robinson” in Bourges on the edge of the Loire Valley.

Wednesday 10 October

Having spent most of the preceding day on the motorway (we note that the French do not call them “freeways” for a very good reason – they are not free. Au contraire, the tolls or “péage” which are extracted from the motoring public are exorbitant.) we again decided to travel on a few back roads. It was in this way (and because the Prop has difficulty in differentiating between a left hand turn and a right hand turn, that we ended up - quite by accident – in the mediaeval town of Loches. After taking lunch in a traditional Lebanese Kebab House, we discovered the old city more or less accidentally. Within are to be found “the old keep” built in the 11^th century and the later (16^th century) Royal Lodge, the latter having been built as a kind of weekender by the Dauphin (later Charles VII of France) not long before being reassured in the living room thereof by Joan of Arc that he was the true heir to the French crown. So persuasive was young Joan that the Dauphin marched up the road to Orleans, defeated the Poms with whom the French had been at war for 100 years (actually a bit less than that but “the Hundred Years War” sounds a lot better that the “Seventy-Three Years War”) and then went to Reims to be crowned King. No doubt the people of France are hoping that “Les Bleus” will emulate the Dauphin’s glorious victory over the English at Stade de France this coming Saturday! Having spent nearly all day in Loches, the Prop and his wife were obliged to make camp at the nearby “Camping La Citadelle” which is handily located not more than a trebuchet’s throw from the Royal Lodge at Loches.

Thursday 11 October

The grand tour of the Châteaux of the Loire valley continued. From Loches we travelled to Chinon to inspect the castle/chateau. Chinon too claims to be the location at which Joan d’Arc persuaded the Dauphin to make his takeover bid for the whole of France! In fact it turns out that Joan met the Dauphin first at Chinon and then (perhaps because he thought what she had told him was too good to be true) had to have a second crack at him at Loches before he finally believed her! The Chateau at Chinon was also the place at which the last of the leaders of the Knights Templar, Jaques de Molay, was imprisoned before his execution in the 14^th century. From Chinon to Azay-Le-Rideau for a glimpse of its very impressive chateau and then further on following the Loire to Amboise whose chateau rises majestically from the banks of the Loire surrounded by the old and then the new city. Bathed in the late autumn sun, it had the appearance of a set from a Walt Disney fairy tale. Bivouacked (?) at “Le Jardin Botanique” at Lumeray – the most appealing feature of which was its name. Its least appealing quality was its near proximity to the TGV (very fast train) rail line and the astonishing frequency of that service.

Friday 12 October

From Lumeray the McRent Reisemobil (and her crew) continued along the banks of the Loire veering inland only long enough to allow us to visit the truly remarkable Chateau Chambord! Built over a period of about 200 years commencing in the 15^th century this amazing example of neo-gothic renaissance architecture defies further description! Now a national monument, the prop could not help thinking that it would have made ideal clubrooms for the now defunct Associates Rugby Club!

Narbonne to Marseilles

Wednesday 3 October 2007

Continued west from Narbonne intending to stay the night at a “camping” at Le Grau De Roi on the Mediterranean coast a little southeast of Montpellier. Although the “camping” was open everything else (except McDonalds) was closed “for the winter”. The Prop, incensed by the insensitivity of the locals to the needs of the travelling Rugby public determined to move on. Much to the delight of the Prop’s wife, we travelled through the Camargue – an extensive delta lying between the petit Garonne and the Garonne rivers and made legendary to the Prop’s wife by her Swiss born former high school French teacher. Noted for its flocks of flamingos, small white ponies and bulls all but the latter were on open display. Eventually stopped the McRent Reisemobil at “Camping de la Crau” at Saint Martin de Crau (and just a few kilometres from a town called La Dynamite! No idea what they make there or why it’s called by that name. The Prop briefly toyed with the thought of including La Dynamite as a stop in the “Dangerous Tour of Europe” but eventually thought better of it and decided to give the place a wide berth.

Thursday 4 October 2007

Having established that there were no “campings” within a bull’s roar of Marseille, the McRent Reisemobil set a course for “Camping Les Cigales” in Cassis – about 20 km southeast of Marseille. With no particular expectations, the Prop and his wife were delighted to discover that Cassis is beautiful seaside resort town nestled among “les Calanques” (a series of precipitous rocky inlets). Spent the afternoon wandering around the waterfront as increasing numbers of Australians (many familiar from previous encounters), Englishmen and South Africans descended upon the town. Spent the evening and some part of the early hours of the next day at the bar in the “camping” discussing the finer points of rugby union with sundry Australians including a particularly enthusiastic couple who turned out to be the parents of Wallaby winger Drew Mitchell! Also finally managed to have a drink with Allan Fong and Suzy Fiddaman (see 12 September) who had been over to Cannes for the day and arranged a luncheon appointment with them in Marseille for the following day. It has to be said that the Prop stayed rather longer at the bar and discussed one or two too many finer points than a prudent man might have done. Considering what can only be described as the intimate sleeping accommodation available in the McRent Reisemobil, this later proved to be the cause of some friction between the Prop and his wife!!

Friday 5 October 2007

The Prop awoke to a fairly chilly atmosphere inside the McRent Reisemobil but was pleasantly surprised to find that the outside temperature was somewhat warmer. We decided to do a practice run on the bus from Cassis into Marseille in preparation for the journeys that will have to be made on Saturday and Sunday to get to the quarter final matches. The bus ride into Marseille is quite spectacular (and unnerving) in places. Apart from the port area around the old city, which is very picturesque, Marseille does not, at first blush, appear to have much to recommend it. It has a reputation (like many sea ports) as a haven for cloak and dagger merchants and, generally speaking, its appearance matches that reputation. An unpleasant odour (apparently emanating from the outdated sewerage system) pervades the air. Had a pleasant lunch with Fongy and Suzy (although Fongy’s lunch arrived about an hour after everyone else’s) and had a bit of a sniff (no pun intended) around the city. Caught the bus back to Cassis only to be involved in some sort of bus hi-jacking incident. It appears some fellow boarded the bus after it already had the maximum number of passengers. He refused to alight. The driver refused to drive the bus, turned off the engine (and the air conditioning) and began making numerous mobile telephone calls. Meanwhile, the supernumary passenger had become the focus of a good deal of gesticulation and apparently hostile badinage. He, for his part, responded in kind. After perhaps 10 minutes or so, one of the other passengers voluntarily alighted from the bus. This appeared to satisfy the driver who then resumed the journey! All very, very French!

Saturday 6 October 2007

Game day! Australia v England!! The sun dawned brightly over Cassis giving no indication of the dark clouds gathering on the near horizon. Set off by bus (no incidents this time, but lots of Pommy rugby fans on board) for the Stade Velodrome in Marseilles. By kickoff (3.00pm) the sun was high in the sky. Although Marseilles is well to the east of France, the whole country shares the same time zone. As a consequence sunrise is relatively late and at 3.00pm the sun is not much past the zenith. Apart from the heat, conditions were more or less ideal for a fast open game. There was a fresh breeze from the south which favoured Australia in the first half. However, unaccountably the Wallabies, instead of trying to play fast open rugby, apparently by design, attempted to take England on at their own style of game – 10 man rugby where the ball is kicked as much as possible to gain territory and to put the goalkicker within range to kick drop goals or, in the event of an opposition indiscretion, penalty goals. In the event, Australia were out-muscled up front by the English forwards and got much less than their fair share of possession. What ball the forwards did win was too often turned over in the rucks and mauls. In what was a lacklustre game all round (All of England’s points came from penalties kicked by the (almost) infallible Johnny Wilkinson) England escaped with a win 12 points to 10 with Australia scoring the only try of the match. Australia might have snatched a late victory with a last gasp penalty goal from what was an improbable position on the field because of the headwind but it was not to be. So for only the second time, Australia went out of the World Cup at the quarter final stage. But, as it happened, this was not to be the greatest surprise of the day. Four hours later in Cardiff, Wales, the red-hot favourites in the tournament, the All Blacks, took on the so far unimpressive French XV. France had lost their opening pool match to Argentina and had not otherwise impressed. New Zealand on the other hand had had enjoyed easy victories in all of their pool matches against generally weak opposition. (The only likely test for new Zealand in their pool matches could come from Scotland. But the Scots, having calculated that they would not defeat New Zealand, had fielded a “B” team against the All Blacks in order to rest a number of key players for their subsequent do or die pool match against Italy. So, with France looking a little out of sorts and the All Blacks appearing invincible – if a little short of recent hard match experience – the battle was joined. It would be unnecessarily cruel to say that New Zealand choked yet again. But the fact is, they never really got their rhythm going despite not looking like they would lose the match. However, in the second half the French, playing their predictably unpredictable style of rugby which seems to incorporate elements of ballet, bluff and all-in wrestling managed to overpower the All Blacks. The new Zealanders will complain for years to come that Michalak’s pass that set up the winning try was forward, but that will not alter the result or soothe the national tragedy for New Zealand! The unbackable All Blacks for the first time ever were bundled out (as they say in tennis circles) of the World Cup in the quarter finals! All in all, not a red letter day for the southern hemisphere.

Sunday 7 October 2007

The Prop awoke wondering if he had had a bad dream and if it was still Saturday after all! However a quick look around “Camping Les Cigales” at the dejected faces of the Aussies and (in only a minority of cases it must be said) the somewhat smug superiority of the English supporters, confirmed the worst. Very early on in the meticulous planning process which lay behind the Odyssey, the Prop had factored in the possibility that the Wallabies might lose their second pool match against Wales. If that had occurred, Australia would have played in the third quarter final and not the first. According (and not without some sense of betrayal) the Prop had cunningly obtained tickets to both the first and third quarter finals. As things turned out Fiji had beaten Wales and so had qualified for the third quarter final against South Africa. After Fiji’s relatively poor showing against Australia (see 23 September) their defeat of Wales (see 29 September) was thought to be something of an aberration and no-one seriously entertained the thought that Fiji might defeat the Springboks – even in the light of the many unexpected, not to say improbable results to that time. In the end though, Fiji fell short of their impossible dream by only a matter of millimetres. Having scored two consecutive tries in the space of two minutes in the second half to draw level while one man down, Fiji went just failed to ground the ball over the Springbok line for a third unanswered try which would have given them the lead with 15 minutes to play and very possibly the momentum to hold the Boks out. As it was, when the try was disallowed one sensed that the Fijians had (as Paul Keating once said) fired the last shot in the locker. Their heads (and their bundles dropped) and South Africa scored two late tries to run out unconvincing winners. Later that night Argentina surprised no-one by defeating Scotland to take the last semi-final spot. Perhaps the only surprise of the game was that Scotland managed to look like they had a chance of winning even as late as the 79^th minute of the match.

Monday 8 October 2007

The Prop and his wife are now at a bit of a loose end. We have tickets to the first semi-final (England v France at Stade de France in Paris on Saturday 13 October) which we had hoped – nay, expected - would feature Australia. We could, no doubt, sell the tickets – probably for a handsome premium – to some surprised England supporter. On the other hand the prospect of a solid encounter in Paris involving the French at home (and who, the prop is bold enough to predict, will run rings around England) is too good to miss. So, with mixed emotions we farewelled Cassis and the many forlorn Aussies we had befriended there and programmed the McRent Reisemobil (which had lain more or less idle at Cassis for four days) to head north for Paris. The Prop insisted on an indirect rout route via Millau to see (and cross) the magnificent Viaduc de Millau – the longest and highest suspension bridge in the world. Having achieved that ambition we made for Camping Les Calquières at Sévérac-le-Château, a little north of Millau.

More soon!!

Rumours of the Prop’s Demise Only Slightly Exaggerated!

15 days into the Odyssey and the Prop finally manages to get Internet Access!

In the interim, the little news that filtered through to us suggested that grave fears were held for our safety.

Fear not – all is well!

A brief rundown on progress so far

Saturday 8^th September

A mostly uneventful flight to London (via Bangkok). At Bangkok Airport we tried out the special “smoking rooms”. These are akin to a King’s Cross “shooting gallery”. Upwards of 20 individuals stand in a 3m X 3m poorly ventilated (perhaps even unventilated) booth and enjoy a quiet smoke – mostly other people’s smoke! Without scuba gear it is impossible to remain in the room for the duration of a single cigarette. The rich aroma which infiltrates one’s clothing remains with us yet. May be time to think about giving up.

Thai Airways business class is pretty good. Food OK – but roast duck at 5.00am takes some getting used to. The much vaunted seats have a control panel which resembles the cockpit of a 747. However, for all the buttons and motors and lumbar supports and massage cycles, the Prop would have been better off in a Laz-E-Boy recliner!

Sunday 9^th September

We landed at Heathrow 10 minutes early and were given “express” passes to speed through customs and immigration. We felt sympathy for the masses of the great unwashed who were forced to line up in the “Others” queue – but for once the Prop’s egalitarian ideals were easily cast aside as we swept effortlessly past!

I don’t suppose anyone would enjoy their job at 7.15am on a Sunday morning, but the rent-a-car man at Heathrow was the very acme of apathy. Nevertheless, after persuading the Prop and his wife that it would be a good idea for them to pay for a full of tank of petrol in advance – so that we wouldn’t have to fill the car up before we returned it – we were more or less on our way. (Upon mature reflection, we concluded that unless we managed to return the car with a completely empty tank, we had been ripped off. This sales technique proves that apathy and avarice are not necessarily incompatible.)

Armed with detailed navigation instructions we set forth for York via the “great circle route”. This route is so-called because it involves missing the turnoff from the giant ring-road that surrounds London and going around in great circles and getting nowhere. Eventually, the Prop jury-rigged some electronic navigation (for those interested, full details will be published later) and the circle was broken!

We left Greater London at about 10.00am (after about 2 hours of that circle stuff) and made the four hour drive to York by about 3.00pm (Go figure!)

We were greeted by our hosts, Emeritus Prof. Lyons and “Squirt” Taylor. Both asserted that the only way to beat jet lag was not to sleep! To this end we were route-marched through central York, before dining at a Sri Lankan Pizzeria.

The proprietor must have known that we had to keep awake because, just as we were beginning to flag, he threatened to kill (and/or dismiss) the Italian chef before our very eyes because of the latter’s failure to deliver our pizzas on time. This was all the more surprising because there was no “ready in 60 minutes or they’re free” policy in place. More walking followed…then unconsciousness!

Monday 10^th September

Prof. Lyons took us on an even longer walk around York (or perhaps it was the whole of Yorkshire!) including walking the entire length of the home straight at York racecourse. “Nether Hornpot Lane” although interesting, was not as titillating as its name may suggest

Tuesday 11^th September

A trip to Yorkshire Dales so that the Prop’s wife could track down James Herriott and have a word to him about that thing he does with long gloves and cows! Didn’t manage to find him. This may be just as well because we don’t own any cows and I don’t relish the thought of the Props’ wife practising on me!

Wednesday 12^th September

A day trip to Edinburgh by train travelling first Class courtesy of the Professor and “Squirt”. Happened to bump into Alan Fong & Suzy Fiddaman (who were up from London for the day and also up from Melbourne for the month) at the end of the Royal Mile. The Professor politely declined the walk around Edinburgh preferring instead to concentrate on academic matters at a succession of local hostelries. The Prop took the opportunity to inspect the artillery at Edinburgh Castle at close quarters.

Thursday 13^th September

A drive to inspect Castle Howard. The owners were evidently having an “open home”. They must want to sell it. Nice enough place - but a bit big for the Prop and his wife and a real bugger to keep warm in winter. We told them “Thanks, but no thanks.”

Friday 14^th September

We bade farewell to the Professor and “Shrimp” and headed for Bristol via Bath.

In point of fact the Professor had risen at 05.00 hours to travel to London on an urgent academic assignment and we couldn’t be bothered getting up that early to see him off so we bade him farewell the night before.

Saturday 15^th September

Millenium Stadium, Cardiff to see Australia v Wales.

Travelled from Bristol to Cardiff in a train that was packed much tighter than any scrum the Prop was ever in! Australia won, but the final scoreline was perhaps a little flattering to the visitors. Nevertheless, the win virtually assures Australia of finishing at the top of their pool.

Other results mean that Australia will almost certainly meet England (rather than South Africa) in the Quarter Final in Marseilles.

Sunday 16^th September

From Bristol to Heathrow to return the hire car with an almost full tank of petrol! (Refer comments under 9^th September, above) Then to Frankfurt on British Airways. Then by taxi to Motel One, Sprendlinger Landstrasse, Offenbach. As a matter of interest the taxi fare from Frankfurt Airport to Offenbach (about 10km) cost more that the airfares from London to Frankfurt! However the Prop and his wife are not entirely convinced that the taxi driver delivered them by the shortest practicable route!

Monday 17^th September

To McRent, Offenbach to collect the famous “McRent ReiseMobile”. After a 7 hour briefing on how to operate the chemical toilet and how to drive on the wrong side of the road (these things not to be done simultaneously) we were underway. By this time the Prop had cunningly obtained a GPS with full-routable maps of England & Europe. Accordingly, with great excitement and full of confidence that there would be no repeat of the “Great Circle Route Incident” (see Sunday 9^th September) we set off for the Black Forest!

More Soon!!!

Rastatt to Narbonne

Tuesday 18^th September 2007

Spent Monday night at Rastatt, a little town just south of Karlsruhe at the gateway to the Black Forest. (Forgot to pack a copy of Horst Jankowski and his orchestra’s version of “A Walk in the Black Forest” and were forced to hum it to ourselves. Stopped at Titisee on the first leg of “The Rude Tour of Europe”. It was unfortunately cold and wet. The Prop suspects that this may be why Titisee did not live up to its name! Due to a navigation malfunction we ended up at Hausach (north of Titisee instead of south.) The Prop was required to manoeuvre the McRent Reisemobil through some impossibly narrow village streets which were already occupied by parked cars with very large German semi-trailers coming in the opposite direction. This, however, was more than made up for by some very spectacular early autumn scenery.

Wednesday 19^th September 2007

Having made the required course corrections, we headed south (more or less) through the heart of the Black Forest and more spectacular scenery. Very surprised to see the prevalence of large solar arrays atop the roofs of the majority of houses and the great number of commercial wind generators fringing the mountain ridges. After emerging from the Black Forest we crossed into Switzerland. The Prop was eager to declare his genius to Swiss immigration authorities but was disappointed to be waved through with nary a cursory look at his passport. Had less luck with the Swiss petro/financial establishment! It took the Prop almost 20 minutes to work out how to operate the “automatic” petrol pumps. Having done so, the Prop and his wife were forced to proffer every plastic card in their possession to the implacably neutral but thoroughly unforgiving Swiss cash machine. Not surprisingly, it rejected the Prop’s Andrew Inglis Clark “out of hours” Library access card but appeared momentarily to accept his Petty Sessions ID card. Luckily, a helpful German tourist (at least he sounded German- but wasn’t wearing lederhosen) gave a practical demonstration and also pointed out that Switzerland, having not adopted the Euro, still uses the Swiss Franc as its unit of currency. Still 100 Francs (about A$120) to only nearly fill the McRent Reisemobil somehow seemed to explain all those solar panels and wind generators! Arrived in Basel (apparently pronounced “Barl”) and following another unnecessary perilous and circuitous drive through the centre of the city, the Prop began to doubt the accuracy of his new navigation equipment.

Thursday 20^th September 2007

Drove from Basel to Neuchatel and following another altercation with a Swiss diesel vending machine (which the machine won) we crossed into France (Again no-one at the border was the least bit interested in the Prop or his wife.) Stopped for the night in St Ettienne du Bois having been assured by the operator of the local Butcherie & Triperie that the Wales v Japan clash could be viewed at the local Sports Bar. Set up camp in the McRent Reisemobil and walked back into town only to find that the Sports Bar was closed. The proprietor of the adjacent Pizzeria helpfully advised that one only had to walk as few as 10 kilometres in order to watch the game at another venue –which he thought would be open! Went to bed instead!!

Friday 21 September 2007

Drove from St Ettienne du Bois to Avignon (as in, Sur Le Pont d’) via the French Motorway system. The toll for an 80 kilometre section was an astonishing 27.60 Euros. Apparently we had to pay double because the McRent Reisemobil is higher than a car! I suspect that the real reason is that the McRent Reisemobil is a high performance unit and so attracts the higher rate.

Camped about 200m from le Pont d’Avignon and made the short walk to the bridge to pose for the obligatory photograph “sur le pont”. The cosmopolitan nature of the city is amply demonstrated by the fact that the Prop’s wife was able to purchase a jar of Vegemite at the local “supermarché”

Saturday 22 September 2007

Drove to Montpellier intending to rendezvous with P A Kimber Esq. who was by now ensconced in an hotel only 800m from our base at “Camping Le Floreal”. Spent the afternoon at the bar of Le Floreal in the company of a large number of Australians – some of whom were sober! Watched a thrilling encounter between South Africa and Tonga on TV. The Prop had managed to persuade the manager (in French) to turn on the telly behind the bar before the scheduled bar opening time at 5.00pm. However, stupidly, the Prop had forgotten to ask the manager to remove the heavy iron security grill from in front of the bar. Accordingly, much of the match had to be viewed by peering through the grating. P A Kimber Esq. eventually arrived on site having walked 5 kilometres and taken a 15 Euro taxi ride to cover the 800m distance referred to above! His navigation equipment must be worse than ours! The grating was removed from the bar for the England v Samoa rubber which was close until half time after which the English unimpressively slipped away and won easily. We too slipped away from “Le Floreal” and got lost on the same 800m journey back to Kimber’s pub for dinner (At least this was the first time we got lost – for Kimber and his daughters it was the second time in 4 hours on the same route!) After another unnecessary taxi ride we enjoyed a slap up beano. Kimber and I had the “Chef’s Suggestion” (It was the only item on the menu in English.) It turns out that what the chef had suggested was 70% kidneys and 30% garlic!!! Still, washed down with a few bottles of “vin de pays” it wasn’t too bad for offal. By this time the Prop was thoroughly disoriented but eager to walk the 800m back to “Le Floreal”. However, the Prop’s wife, with her usual acumen and calm steady nature, insisted we take a taxi. Geographically embarrassed as he was, the Prop is bound to say that this was the longest 800m taxi ride he has ever taken.

Sunday 23 September 2007

Game day! Australia v Fiji at Stade de Bosson. Woke quite early all things considered. Decided to venture into the heart of Montpellier to absorb some local atmosphere. The previous night’s 800m taxi ride had left us with no “billets” (i.e. ready money) Luckily Kevin and Bridget (two of the more sober Australians at the bar the day before) offered us a lift into town in their taxi. Managed to obtain plenty of billets from an obliging French ATM (which was altogether less discriminating than its aforementioned Swiss counterparts) and had a good sniff about before taking yet another jam-packed tram from Montpellier to Bosson. We were seated about centre field three rows from the back – estimated to be about the same altitude as the summit of Mont Blanc. It was over 30 degrees and rather too hot for Rugby. Australia comfortably but again (the Prop thought) rather unconvincingly accounted for their south sea island opponents 55 – 12. (However, in view of Fiji’s later victory over Wales [see below] it was a pretty good result.) Following the game we had a few drinks with Good Matt and Bad Matt (another two rather less sober Australians from the bar at “Le Floreal” the day before) and a strange baguette shaped steak sandwich filled with hot chips while we waited for the crowds at the tram station to dissipate. Got back into Montpellier just in time to see the final moments of the All Black’s demolition of the Scotland B team before taking another taxi back to “Le Floreal”. Strangely, this taxi cost less than the 800m journey the night before (see above) The barman claimed to have seen the Prop on telly during the course of the broadcast of the game! However, the lack of any international response to the Prop’s supposed appearance leads him to conclude that it must have been Brumbies coach Laurie Fisher on the telly.

Monday 24 September 2007

Navigated the McRent Reisemobil from Montpellier to the restored medieval city of Carcassonne. Quite impressive in some ways and quite vulgar in others. The Prop (who is not known for his architectural sensitivity) was more than a little surprised to find a 13^th century basilica and a 21^st century Best Western hotel sitting cheek by jowl in the centre of the old city!

Tuesday 25^th September 2007

After a week of fabulous weather the inevitable change arrived. We had originally intended heading down the coast into Spain and Andorra for a day or two before going to Bordeaux. However, we got word that camping accommodation in Bordeaux was very scarce (only one 30 site camping park in a city of 2 million) Accordingly, the GPS was reprogrammed to take the McRent Reisemobil west towards Toulouse and the Midi Pyrenees. The Prop had been experiencing extraordinary difficulty obtaining internet access so that the blog could be updated (not to mention the payment of sundry creditors) and hit upon the idea of finding a “camping” that offered wireless internet – or “le wee-fee” as we Frech speakers like to call it. It was in this way that we found ourselves somewhere in the foothills of the Pyrenees at “Camping Le Moulin” in the tiny village of Matres-Tolosane. Weather appalling but internet OK – and free!!

Wednesday 26^th September 2007

From Matres-Tolosane to Bordeaux in the trusty McRent Reisemobil! Booked in to “Camping Beausoleil” – the only camp ground in (or more precisely 12 km out of) town. We were offered a “half-pitch” to share with others. We took it. The Prop thought that a couple of young French sheilas might move in next door and so, for first time in 23 years he shaved his beard off!!! As luck would have it we were assigned to share a pitch with a Welshman and his English wife who had come to Bordeaux from Edinburgh to watch three games of Rugby in which neither Wales nor England was involved. Despite his disappointment, the Prop made the best of things having discovered that the Welshman was not averse to a chilled lager or two. Indeed, it was during the course of consuming one or two of the above that the Welshman confided that he too had hoped to share his pitch with something more attractive than the Prop – even without his beard.

Thursday 27^th September 2007

Spent the day sniffing around in town. Did the obligatory open top bus tour of the city. As the Americans would say (according to Prof Lyons) “My Gard Harry – there’s so march Gard-am history here!”

Friday 28^th September 2007

Spent the day attending to matters of personal administration (e.g. washing undies etc., shopping for essential supplies and the like.) Dined in the McRent Reisemobil on tinned “casoulet” a local dish consisting of haricot beans, pork sausage and duck meat (and quite a lot of duck fat). Not bad at all – though not as tasty as the “Chef’s Suggestion” (See 22 September) and a real “doona-lifter”. Went with the Welshman (Mike) and his wife (Judy) to “Le Terminus”, a local (i.e. 1 km away) bar to watch England v Tonga. “Le Terminus” is so small that with a 20 inch telly inside, the Welshman and the Prop had to take it in turns to go in and watch the game. For a brief period when the barman went to the toilet, we were both able to watch at the same time.

Saturday 29^th September 2007

Game day! Australia v Canada at Stade Chaban-Delmas. The Prop and his wife had tickets in the “Presidentielle” section. This sounded so impressive that the Prop thought about wearing a coat and tie instead of his old Wallabies jumper. The seats were just on half way and one row back from the front and immediately behind the Australian bench. (Matt Giteau’s mum turned up next to us after the game to hand her famous son a cream cake!) The seats would have been real crackers if it hadn’t started pouring with rain just before kick-off (or if the seats had been covered.) As it was the prop and his wife absorbed more moisture that the Canadians absorbed pressure during the course of a 37–6 defeat. Not a terribly flattering score line for the Wallabies but not too bad given the conditions. The Welshman and his wife arrived back at camp at about 10.30 following Wales’ shock defeat by Fiji. The loss meant that Wales did not make the quarter finals and that, for the first time ever, Fiji has progressed beyond the pool stage. They will meet South Africa in Marseilles next Sunday – the day after Australia plays England at the same venue. We have tickets to both games.

Sunday 30^th September 2007

Headed south towards Biarritz to dry out! Stayed overnight at “Camping Berrua” at Bidart – just south of Biarritz. Had the unusual pleasure of being able to watch the France v Romania and the Ireland v Argentina games on free to air digital television while seated in the shade outside the McRent Reisemobil. Generally speaking only the games involving France are shown on free-to-air television here. The remainder are on pay TV and only accessible in some bars. Had dinner at the Restaurant Auguste. Being short of “billets” again and the “Auguste” not accepting credit cards the Prop and his wife were forced to select from the very popular 10 Euro menu – which did not disappoint! Three of anything for 10 Euros in this country is a rarity, so a three course meal for that price is a genuine bargain. The Prop had mussels, shrimp and cheese while the Prop’s wife dined out on a rich bacon and egg salad, steak and “frites” and ice-cream. Delicious!

Monday 1 October 2007

Took the back roads through the Haute Garronne and Midi Pyrenees through a succession of tiny villages and towns to arrive at “Camping L’Estlas” in Mauvezin De Prat near Saint Girons. Much more difficult driving the McRent Reisemobil through these narrow village streets and seemingly endless roundabouts – but much more rewarding than the sterile efficiency of the Motorways.

Tuesday 2 October 2007

Exceptionally beautiful scenery as we travelled southeast in the shadows of the Midi Pyrenees and the Pryrenees Orientales again keeping to the secondary and tertiary (and possibly even the quaternary) road system. With a single-minded determination the Prop and his wife headed for “Camping La Nautique” just south east of Narbonne with one aim in mind – to find internet access so as to update the blog and satisfy the insatiable appetite of our readers for up-to-date information.

Tomorrow its onwards and upwards (in a general northeasterly direction) along the Mediterranean coast towards Marseilles and the eagerly anticipated quarter final contest between the Wallabies and England.

More soon!!